After his court appearance, Michael Jackson made a statement that included a lengthy tangent about how much he loves the people of Santa Maria--people who'll soon comprise his jury.

The travesty is over. John Stevens has finally been voted off American Idol! Producers bought this guy's bus ticket back home months ago, but little eight-year-old girls kept voting for him!

I told you about JohnStevensSucks.com (which has changed its tune since the red-head's ouster). I'm not known for "fair and balanced" reporting, but here you go: ILoveJohnStevens.com.

Paul McCartney and Bob Dylan are interested in having their songs featured next season on American Idol, according to Entertainment Weekly.

Throat problems have forced Christina Aguilera to cancel her upcoming tour with Chingy.

There's a nasty rumor circulating the Internet saying singer Chilli (TLC) was beaten by her new boyfriend Ray Lewis (Baltimore Ravens), and that she ended up in the hospital. Chilli has issued a statement saying it simply isn't true.

Hanson is number one!!! Okay, settle down there, "Zack." The trio, who no longer record for a major record label, debut on top the Billboard independent sales chart with their new CD, Underneath.

The real numero uno: Usher's Confessions tops the Billboard album chart for the fourth-straight week.

Shii Ann was sent home Thursday night on Survivor: All-Stars. Just one more episode before next Sunday's live finale.

Jessica Simpson had Lasik eye surgery this past Monday. People tried to say she couldn't read--maybe she just couldn't see.

Former presidential candidate Howard Dean might become a talk show host. Really? Aren't the people screaming usually the guests?

Nothing creeps me out like FOX's The Swan. Yet even as I'm yelling at the TV, I still manage to watch every addictive minute of it. It just so happens the makeover show/beauty show/crush your dreams show is coming back for a second season. And yes, they need some "ugly ducklings."

New in theaters: Mean Girls; Laws of Attraction; Godsend.

--Greg Valentine

"Incredibly racist." That's what Elton John--who worked with the American Idol finalists on a recent show--says about last week's bottom-three appearance by Fantasia Barrino, Lotoya London and Jennifer Hudson. Elton says they are the most talented.

Or maybe it's just a mass case of damaged ear drums. (How else can you explain John Stevens still being on the show?).

Be part of the solution… visit JohnStevensSucks.com!

Okay, okay… we've been pretty tough on the 16-year-old Conan O'Brien look-alike. Word is John Stevens visits the staff counselor regularly to help deal with the pressure of competing on Idol--and for some of the more vocal negative feedback.

What is it about Britney Spears and dancers with fiancées (other than there's a good chance they're straight)? Kevin Federline is the name of the Ms. Spears' latest conquest--and like a previous fling, this guy's fiancée is pregnant!

Four shots were fired at a police van near the filming of a J-Kwon music video yesterday in St. Louis. Nobody was injured.

MTV, MTV2, VH1, VH1 Classic and BET will all air a Prince concert special tonight. It's the first time all five networks have broadcast they same show simultaneously.

Beyonce recently hired 15 look-alikes to distract the paparazzi so she could sunbath topless during a recent Mediterranean vacation. I'd say that probably worked--I'm getting pretty distracted just thinking about it.

The Apprentice runner-up, Kwame Jackson, could end up on CNBC of MSNBC in some sort of financial reporting role.

Now that's what I call 'Must-See TV'! Bobby Brown has taped an interview with Stone Phillips that airs Friday night on Dateline NBC. Brown will admit to being high on coke and weed for weeks at a time.

Motown 45, a TV special celebrating the legendary record label, will air May 17th, and feature the return of the Backstreet Boys and an appearance by American Idol's Kimberly Locke. Such Motown legends as Smoky Robinson, the Commodores and members of the Supremes will also perform, naturally.

D12 and the Beastie Boys are confirmed musical performers for the 2004 MTV Movie Awards on June 5th.

Uncle Kracker drops his new CD, 72 And Sunny on June 29th.

Kid Rock performs tonight on Jay Leno.

--Greg Valentine

Monday, April 26th, 2004

So what does Ryan Seacrest say about the talented Jennifer Hudson being voted off American Idol? "That's a part of the reason 'AI' is a compelling TV show -- there's the element of surprise, the unexpected, whether it's good or bad, right or wrong."

Agreed, Mr. Seacest. In fact, if I were the producer, it's the kind of thing I'd 'script' into the show by blocking out the phone lines so nobody could get through for someone like Jennifer!

Michael Jackson has dumped his high-priced lawyers for… some other high-priced lawyers. Boring! Let this trial begin!

Denzel Washington's Man on Fire made $23 million to become the number one movie over the weekend, in a photo finish with Jennifer Garner's $22 million-earner 13 Going on 30.

A special DVD/CD package called Beyonce: Live At Wembley hits stores tomorrow, featuring a live concert filmed in London-and three brand new songs. Movie theaters around the country are screening the DVD tonight. See RegalCM.com for the info.

The new D12/Eminem CD D12 World also comes out tomorrow. The group, featuring a certain Marshall Mathers dude, sold two million copies of their last album, Devil's Night.

Finally a Broadway musical for the rest of us: Jerry Springer--The Opera hits New York City after breaking records (maybe a couple of chairs and noses, too?) in London.

Blender magazine recently announced its list of the 50 worst songs of all-time (there were some good tunes on there, too!). Now VH1 plans to count them down with The 50 Most Awesomely Bad Songs...Ever, airing next month.

Singer Billy Joel skidded off another road in Long Island over the weekend-his third accident in two years. Which reminds of this joke I wish I would've thought of: "The price of gas is SO high… Billy Joel had to take the bus to that tree he was gonna hit!"

--Seacrest out!

More Showbizz Buzz